פרשת חיי שרה
This week’s Parsha tells us how Avraham Avinu, after realizing that Yitzchak’s life could have ended during the Akeidah, realized he had better begin the process of seeking a mate for his son Yitzchak. In order to do this, he charged his trusted servant Eliezer with the formidable task of finding a very special girl suitable to be a mother of the Jewish lineage. The Torah delineates in great detail Eliezer’s trip to foreign lands, and his ultimate success in discovering Rivka, the daughter of Besuel, and how he went ahead and betrothed her for Yitzchak. When Eliezer was asked by Besuel about his journeys, the Torah records Eliezer’s response, which essentially, is an exact repeat of the previous two pages in the Chumash. The Midrash Rabah notices this lengthy account and comments that we can see from here how dear the Forefathers were such that their servants’ conversations seem to get more airtime then actual Halachos which are taught to us by the Torah. The laws of impurity, whose significance should be applicable to us daily, need to be learnt out from one extra letter in the Torah, whereas this account of Eliezer, which seems to have no practical import, gets four full pages in the Chumash. Why is it that Hashem chose such an overemphasis on the life events of the forefathers?
R’ Aharon Kotler the renowned Rosh Yeshiva of the Lakewood Yeshiva deals with this issue. R’ Aharon explains that in order to understand this Midrash, we must first identify the purpose of Sefer Bereishis. The Gemorah in Avoda Zara (25a) explains that Bereishis is also called “Sefer Hayashar”. The reason for this obscure name is because its goal is to straighten out our character traits. In other words, since the whole purpose of the first of the five books of Moses is solely to straighten us out, it comes as no surprise that the bulk of the content therein will be dealing with the forefathers, whose stellar attributes are the primary example for us to lean from when we embark on the journey of proper moral conduct. R’ Aharon goes on to explain that in this particular example, he counted three fundamental principles that could be generated from the way in which the Chumash chose to relate the story of Eliezer and his journeys.
Firstly, we find what to look for when seeking a mate. We find that Eliezer’s first criterion when determining who would be fitting to be a Matriarch for all future Jews, was a girl who excelled in the attribute of kindness. Not only that, he looked specifically for a girl who would go above and beyond what was asked of her in the arena of caring about another human being. It seems that the Torah is teaching us that this trait is critical in a Jewish wife and mother. Secondly, R’ Aharon points out, we find an interesting lesson in the way that Eliezer introduces himself. He could have easily mentioned his status as the man in charge of Avraham’s limitless fortune, which needless to say, offered him a position of tremendous power. Instead, he introduced himself quite simply, as the servant of Avraham. This unassuming and modest choice of words teaches us how important the trait of humility is and how to downplay our own status at all times. And thirdly, Eliezer gives us insight into the trait of Bitachon, and prayer in the way he relates to his task. We find that throughout his journey, he is constantly speaking with God, and asking His help in all his challenges, and he acts with complete trust that Hashem would guide him along the correct path whose destination would be a positive one.
I would like to add one point to R’ Aharon’s beautiful summary which I believe we can learn from the episode with Eliezer which is also mentioned by the Sabba from Nevardok in his famous work Madregos Ha’adam. Chazal teach us that Eliezer could have had a very good reason for not wanting to succeed in his mission. Eliezer himself had a daughter who was a wonderful girl, and he wanted more than anything to be able to marry her off to Yitzchak, his beloved master’s son. However, Avraham responded negatively to Eliezer’s request, explaining to him that that Eliezer’s daughter, who came from the non-Jewish nations was cursed and therefore inappropriate for Yitzchak, who was blessed. Now Eliezer had a real dilemma on his hands. On the one hand, he knew that the right thing to do was to fulfill his master’s command to the letter without deviating even minimally. Yet on the other hand, in his heart, he was hoping that he would fail in his mission, resulting in his daughter being the default mate for Yitzchak. He therefore made a conscious decision to not let his feelings get in the way of what he knew was right, and this is a powerful lesson to us. The Chumash gives us a number of examples of this behavior. Firstly, we find that he prayed that he should be successful in his mission, and did not rely on Avraham’s prayer. He did this in order that he may be saved from his strong urge to sabotage his mission. When he found Rivka, he immediately removed his precious jewels from his travel pack, and placed them on her hand and betrothed her for Yitzchak, before he even knew for sure that she was the right one. He acted this quickly in order to not allow any chance for his Yetzer Hara to get in the way, reasoning to himself that even if he were wrong, he could always take the precious stones back. Similarly, he wasn’t willing to eat or drink with Lavan and Besuel until he had spoken his piece and determined whether or not his mission was a success. From all these lessons it is clear to what extent a person must go to ensure that the Yetzer Hara, who is very tricky, not even be allowed the tiniest opportunity to trick a person and enter his heart.
I feel that this point of not allowing the Yetzer Hara even the most minuscule foothold in our hearts can be demonstrated very nicely through a true story that happened to R’ Yisroel Salanter. R’ Yisroel was once traveling from Kovna to Vilna which was quite common for him as he was the Rabbi of Kovna, but grew up in Vilna. During the train ride, he was sitting in the smoking section of the train as per his normal practice, and he was smoking a cigarette. (At that time, most of the Rabbis smoked as the health implications were not yet known). A young Avrech who was sitting next to R’ Yisroel and was not aware of his identity began to berate R’ Yisroel for his Chutzpah to smoke a cigarette next to him. R’ Yisroel, making no mention of the obvious retort that he was sitting in the smoking car, quietly put out his cigarette and apologized to this gentleman for being so inconsiderate. Shortly afterward, this Avrech began to rant and rave how inconsiderate R’ Yisroel was for keeping the window of the train open during the ride, and how freezing he was. Again, R’ Yisroel quietly mentioned that it wasn’t him who opened the window, but if this man would like, he would be happy to close it, which he promptly did. When the train arrived in Vilna, there was a sizeable crowd awaiting the venerable Tzadik at the station and this mortified Avrech ran out of the train station in shame. A few days later, this young man mustered up the courage to beg R’ Yisroel’s forgiveness. R’ Yisroel responded by saying that there was nothing to forgive, and asked the purpose for his visit. This Avrech said timidly that he desired to learn the laws of Shechita and become a Shochet. R’ Yisroel enthusiastically told him that his relative was the head Shochet and he could set him up in a course. The man tried it, but after two days quit the program because the laws were too complicated for him. R’ Yisroel suggested that perhaps with private tutelage, he would have more success, and went ahead and set up a private tutor for the man who succeeded in helping this man pass his course, and R’ Yisroel then went on to land him a position in which he became a very successful Shochet. When his students asked him why it was that he went so far out of his way to help this young man, R’ Yisroel responded that while it was true that he forgave him for the way he acted, he knew that he was only human, and perhaps somewhere in his heart, he bore some kind of resentment toward this Avrech, and therefore wanted to do everything in his power to remove that small remnant of animosity that may have been festering in his heart. From this story, I believe it is clear how careful we must be to ensure that the Yetzer Hara has no place whatsoever in our being.
May we all merit to serve Hashem with all of our hearts!