פרשת נשא
In this week’s Parsha, one of the topics discussed is the laws pertaining to a Nazir. A Nazir is somebody who takes a vow for at least thirty days to abstain from wine and all vineyard products, to allow his hair to grow, and to not come in contact with any corpse. The Torah goes to great lengths to praise a Nazir’s decision to sanctify himself, and even says that he achieves a holier status than a Kohen. Furthermore, from the moment he accepts these stringencies upon himself, the Torah pronounces him holy, even before he completes his vow. In another verse, the Nazir is described as having a crown on his head, implying that his level of importance is elevated to that of a king of Israel! Why does the Torah “go to town” so excessively for these seemingly minor abstentions that the Nazir has accepted upon himself, and all this, even before he has actually made good on his vow?
R’ Chazkal Levinstein was bothered by this issue, and he found an Ibn Ezra who scrutinizes the verse, “איש כי יפליא נדר” – “When a man takes on a wondrous vow”. The Ibn Ezra explains this odd term by saying that if a man chooses to swim against the indulgent current of the world, which seems to gravitate toward self fulfillment and the blind seeking of pleasure no matter what the cost, this truly is a praiseworthy decision and deserves great adulation by the Torah. A man who chooses to keep his passions at bay, amidst a sea of people that will simultaneously be wary of him, and scorn him, has truly earned the title of “holy” which the Torah bestows upon him for he has fought two very natural tendencies – to go with the flow, and to follow his wants. A person who chooses to work on these traits, even though they may ultimately fail, is dubbed by the Torah as holy.
R’ Chazkal would bring The Vilna Gaon who takes it a step further. The Gaon says that for a person to limit his food intake, and to control his other physical desires, is his entire purpose on this earth, and if he can manage to do so, it is greater than all the fasts in the world. He goes on to say that for every moment that a person controls himself, he will merit to see a light that even the angels themselves cannot fathom, (which makes sense since angels have never had to control their passions), and that in doing so, he will be forgiven for every sin that he has ever done! Such is the significance and power, asserts the Gaon, of controlling one’s desires. Parenthetically, R’ Chazkal would point out that being forgiven for one’s sins is axiomatic, because if a person has managed to contain himself when he needed to, the Torah labels him as holy, and since one cannot be holy, and be a sinner at the same time, it stands to reason that his sins have been forgiven.
However, there is one loose end that R’ Chazkal felt the need to tie up. After all we have said, and all the praise we have given the Nazir, the ending doesn’t make any sense. After his term of Nezirus, the Nazir has to bring a very serious sin offering, so serious in fact, that it is more severe than had he broken his vow in the middle of his term, which only gets a double bird offering? How then can we understand the severity of the way he is treated in light of all the aforementioned commendations? The Ramban explains succinctly that the offering brought is not to atone for what he has done, but rather to atone for the fact that he is now ending the term of his vow. After he saw what it feels like to be holy, and to be considered a monarch, and to rule over his inclinations, how could he choose to simply abandon all that loftiness, and go back and swim with the riffraff? Such a decision warrants a severe reprimand and that is the rationale behind the sin offering he must bring at the end of his term. The Mashgiach would conclude by saying that this type of Yetzer Hara is not uncommon. How often do we find a Jew who has a kindred spirit, and achieves all sorts of levels in his growth, only to abandon them shortly afterward when he becomes discouraged? We must all strengthen ourselves on this point to never falter once we have begun growing, and make sure to continue growing our entire lives.
It is clear from all that we have said how strongly it behooves us to take hold of ourselves when the occasion arises, and to be in control of our passions. I would like to discuss some practical pieces of advice on how to do this. First, we must realize that each and every passion that rules us prevents us from being a free man. Everybody wants to feel free. When there is a particular passion that we cannot control, it literally hijacks our heart and will not be still until it is dealt with. It is said about the Steipler that he refused to learn in an air conditioned room, because he feared he would become accustomed to it, and than if he were ever deprived of it, would find it difficult to learn. On the other hand, somebody who is in control truly feels like a king! He has achieved sovereignty over his own heart, and that thought is extremely empowering. Considering this notion is an effective tool in helping one overcome his natural pulls.
Another valuable suggestion comes from the Rambam. The Rambam in fourth chapter of the laws of Nezirus rules that it is forbidden for a Nazir to sit amongst his friends while they are indulging in wine, lest he come to get caught up in their merriment and transgress, and he should physically distance himself from such a group. The Rambam is teaching us a valuable lesson in control. It is nearly impossible to do it when there is no social support to back a person up. If a person wants to be successful in managing his cravings, he cannot be around people that are wildly giving into theirs, for he will certainly founder.
And the final piece of advice that I can offer to those who wish to evolve comes from my father Z”l, who was my personal example of what it means to be a king on this earth, and whose Yortzheit is tomorrow. After my father passed away, we found in his notebook many behaviors he had accepted upon himself in order to grow, and amongst them, we found that he had detailed allotments for how much time he allowed himself for eating or sleeping during the day, and for what he would eat, and for meeting his other physical needs. He had a specific schedule, and knowing in advance exactly how much time he had for these activities, and how much he would allow himself to indulge, made it a lot easier for him to confine himself to those boundaries. As we all know, if you give a person an hour break, it takes him an hour to get everything done, and if you give him a 15 minute break, than that’s is exactly how long it takes him. So the final advice that I can offer is to be prepared. When one has a specific schedule about which desires he plans to indulge, and which he plans to abandon, it makes it a lot easier to handle them.
May we all merit to actualize the lofty lessons we learn from the Nazir and to control our passions for the sake of Hashem!