When Everything is “Going Wrong”

By Rabbi Moshe Krieger, Yeshivas Bircas HaTorah (www.bircas.org)

In Parashas Vayishlach, Yaakov prepares for a confrontation with Esav. After so many years away from his brother, Yaakov had hoped that he would have put their bad blood behind him. However, after hearing that Esav was marching towards him with four hundred armed men, Yaakov realized that the prospect of peace was remote. He therefore helped his family cross the Yabok River to a safer location. After his family crossed successfully, Yaakov recalled that a few tiny jugs remained behind, so he went back across the river to retrieve them. This decision set the stage for the fight Yaakov had with a divine being that Chazal tell us was Esav’s guiding angel.

Before Yaakov was even aware of the angel’s presence, the verse notes a seemingly unnecessary detail: “Yaakov remained alone.” Of course Yaakov was alone—he left his entire family on the other side of the river! What purpose did the Torah have for telling us this?

Rav Gedalia Schorr explains that when the Torah states that Yaakov was alone, it means it in the truest sense. The feeling of Hashem’s presence left him. Even during the earliest challenges of his life, he had always felt that Hashem guided and protected him. This was due to his constant work on sensing Hashem’s presence at all times. Rav Schorr points out that Yaakov’s emunah was so strong that he felt Hashem’s presence in a way that is usually only felt in the World to Come. Now, however, Yaakov felt that he had been abandoned, and he did not feel Hashem’s presence. Naturally, he was deeply troubled by this.

This battle with Yaakov’s angelic adversary presented a true test to his emunah. The angel had been sent specifically to challenge his faith. Now that Yaakov did not feel Hashem’s presence so strongly, would he waver, or would he stand strong and retain his exalted level?

Even though Yaakov did not feel Hashem’s presence, he chose to strengthen his emunah. In doing so, he won the battle with the angel and earned the name Yisrael.

The Ramban (Eikev 7:12) teaches that the name Yisrael stems from the Hebrew word “yashar,” meaning “straight.” “Yisrael” is a compound word that means “one who goes directly to Hashem.” Although Hashem created the illusion that He had abandoned Yaakov to his own resources, Yaakov stayed true to his belief that Hashem was still with him.

Most of us have ups and downs in our Yiddishkeit, especially concerning emunah. Sometimes it seems as if Hashem has abandoned us, G-d forbid, and we feel bleak despair. Yaakov Avinu serves as an example of how to face these moments. We should never give up hope. Times like these are in fact an opportunity to strengthen our connection to Hashem.

Not only should we strive to connect to Him even when times are difficult, seeing Hashem in the darkness is really the essence of emunah. There’s a famous debate between the Rambam and Ramban as to whether belief in Hashem is a mitzvah or not. The Rambam lists emunah first in his Sefer HaMitzvos. The Ramban objects, arguing that belief in Hashem cannot possibly be a mitzvah. He explains that one who is a Torah Jew must believe in Hashem by default. Emunah is the foundation of all the mitzvos—how can it be a mitzvah in itself?

The Slonimer Rebbe offers an explanation for the Rambam’s view. Belief in Hashem is not always easy, even for one who keeps the Torah. When everything goes our way, it’s very easy to believe. The litmus test of faith is when Hashem seems absent. Struggling to see Hashem’s Hand when everything is going wrong is the mitzvah of emunah that the Rambam is referring to.

This was the true glory of the Jewish people throughout our long exile. In the darkest times of the life of a Jew—that is when his faith in Hashem shines forth for the entire world to see. When we cling to Hashem and believe in Him despite our troubles, we show the world what emunah is all about.

A childless couple once went to Rav Shimshon Pinkus for counsel and a blessing. They had tried everything—prayer, doctors, medical research, and new forms of treatment, all to no avail. Rav Pinkus told the couple that they still hadn’t tried something very important. Had they ever truly poured out their hearts to Hashem, declaring their complete dependence on Him?

Rav Pinkus recommended that the couple drive out to a private place where no one was around, and cry out to Hashem for a child. The couple took the Rav’s advice. A short time later, they were blessed with a child. Perhaps Hashem was waiting for them to place their faith only in Him.

May we be zocheh to maintain our connection with Hashem even in the darkest of times!

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Rabbi Krieger’s “Gedolei Yisroel on the Parashah & Yamim Tovim” is now available from the Yeshiva office, Jewish bookstores worldwide and can be ordered online at https://www.feldheim.com/gedolei-yisroel-on-Parashah-yamim-tovim-2.