פרשת תולדות
This week’s Parsha tells us how Yitzchak and Rivka were childless for many years. The verse says that they both prayed opposite each other – meaning to say for the same purpose – to have children. The Gemorah in Yevamos (64) makes note of the fact that the verse says that God answered him (Yitzchak), when it should have said that God answered them. The Gemorah explains that one cannot compare Yitzchak’s prayer, who was righteous and his father was righteous as well, to Rivka’s prayer, who although being righteous herself did not have a righteous father. One could ask on this Gemorah, it seems strange that Hashem would show favoritism to one who grows up in a home of righteous people. Isn’t it more impressive for one to make something of themselves despite their coming from a background which would hinder righteous activity? Furthermore, Rashi in this week’s Parsha praises Rivka specifically for her remaining righteous in spite of the fact that she was surrounded by wicked people, and it is well know that in the place where Baale Teshuva stand, even completely righteous Tzadikim cannot approach this place. Why then was Rivka not deserving that her prayers should be answered as well?
The renowned Mashgiach, R’ Shteinholtz, offers one possibility to resolve the apparent contradiction. He quoted R’ Simcha Ziesel who explains that there are two different kinds of prayers in the world. The first is a prayer which is borne out of desperation that one feels because of his situation in life and his recognition that God is the only one who can save him. While this prayer is certainly a lofty prayer, and is well received by God, and will usually generate a lot of Kavana in the one who is praying, R’ Simcha Ziesel explains that this kind of prayer is not completely for the sake or God, but rather a desperate cry for help which is coming from a certain place of selfishness and one’s desire for his own good. On the other hand there is a prayer which is far loftier, but on the same token is far more difficult to generate concentration for. This is a prayer that one makes to God, not on account of any difficulty that one is experiencing, but rather solely for the ability to stand in front of God and talk to one’s creator. (This kind of person may indeed have difficulties but that is not his reason for praying). He calls this “Prayer for the sake of Prayer”. This kind of prayer evidences that this person has no selfish motivation for his prayer, rather he is one who possesses an unconditional love for God. This, explains R’ Simcah, is what the Gemorah is referring to when it says that one should always precede his difficulties with prayer and not wait until he has anguish to begin praying.
With this principle the Mashgiach removes our difficulty. While it is certainly true that both Yitzchak and Rivka’s prayers were very special, Yitzchak himself had no reason to pray. Yitzchak, being the son of Avraham Avinu was already assured that he would be made into a great nation and have many children. The only thing he wasn’t sure of was whether or not his progeny would come through Rivka or another woman. His prayer, therefore, was not borne out of desperation, but rather was just his normal every day prayer which happened to have a request in it. Rivka on the other hand had no such assurance. Her prayer ergo could not have been totally for the sake of heaven and was therefore not as fitting to be answered as Yitzchak’s was.
Perhaps we could bring another illustration to the Mashgiach’s point from the Gemora in Berachos. The Gemorah says that although Shacharis and Mincha are obligatory prayers, Maariv is only optional. How do we explain Maariv’s seemingly menial stature? We know that there are two opinions for the derivation of prayer. According to one opinion, prayer was instituted by the forefathers and according to the second opinion prayer was instituted in place of the service in the Holy Temple. If one examines the forefather’s prayers, one sees an interesting anomaly with Yaakov. Both Avraham’s and Yitzchak’s prayers were performed in places of holiness and done on a consistent basis. However, when it came to Yaakov’s prayer, the Torah uses a more happenstance language as if to say that Yaakov “happened” into prayer. We can thereby explain the “happenstance” nature of Maariv today. Since it wasn’t founded in a proper “kavua” way, even today it is not obligatory. Similarly according to the opinion that Prayer corresponds with the Temple Service, the evening temple service was optional and not done on a consistent basis.
Based on what we have explained, it is clear how important it is for one’s prayer to be uttered in a calm state of mind and in a consistent manner, even on an external level. Why is this “consistency” such an integral point in prayer? When a person loves another person, they want to talk with that person at every available opportunity. They never even miss one chance, and in fact show up early in order to precede their meeting with this person. This would explain why there is a Halacha that one must pray in the same place every day, and not one day here and one day there. Similarly, one should enter prayer in a calm state and not have many things on his mind, rendering his prayer unfit. Rather one’s prayer must come out in a consistent and calm manner and this should generate in a person the true feelings that prayer is supposed to generate – love and awe of one’s creator and a genuine feeling of privilege at the ability to speak with Him.
May we merit to realize the valuable opportunity that we are given on a daily basis and take full advantage of it!